Reading List
The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.
Job Applicant Informed Role Of Pig Boy Has Been Filled
MILWAUKEE—Dashing his hopes of taking on the new opportunity, local job applicant Mark McCarthy was reportedly informed by email Wednesday that the role of pig boy had already been filled. “While we appreciate your obvious skill at eating up slop and rolling around in the mud on your fat, pink belly, we have moved forward […]
The post Job Applicant Informed Role Of Pig Boy Has Been Filled appeared first on The Onion.
3,800 Workers Strike At Massive Meatpacking Plant
About 3,800 workers at one of the nation’s largest meatpacking plants began striking in Colorado, the first walkout at a U.S. beef slaughterhouse in four decades, with the work stoppage following accusations that the company retaliated against employees and committed other unfair labor practices during contract negotiations. What do you think?
The post 3,800 Workers Strike At Massive Meatpacking Plant appeared first on The Onion.
Live Action Short Film Winner Celebrates By Taking Oscar To In-N-Out Shift
LOS ANGELES—Claiming it was the only place he wanted to go after receiving one of Hollywood’s highest honors, Academy Award winner for Best Live Action Short Film Jack Piatt celebrated Tuesday by taking his Oscar to his In-N-Out shift. “When I heard our film get called, there was no question in my mind—I was going […]
The post Live Action Short Film Winner Celebrates By Taking Oscar To In-N-Out Shift appeared first on The Onion.
Unemployed Man Considers Going Back To School To Become AI
PIKEVILLE, KY—Speculating that a new path in life might improve his job prospects, unemployed man Ian Hampel, 36, told reporters Tuesday that he was considering going back to school to become an AI. “I can see the writing on the wall: If I want to stay relevant in the workforce, I’m going to need to […]
The post Unemployed Man Considers Going Back To School To Become AI appeared first on The Onion.
Stephen Miller Assures Susie Wiles He Has Fridge Full Of Healthy Human Breasts
The post Stephen Miller Assures Susie Wiles He Has Fridge Full Of Healthy Human Breasts appeared first on The Onion.