FOXBOROUGH, MA—In an effort to promote a safer environment at Gillette Stadium, the New England Patriots announced Wednesday that they would stop serving alcohol to players after the third quarter. “We have unfortunately heard more than a few complaints about our players’ rowdy and aggressive behavior,” said Patriots spokesperson Aaron Kozachik, who stressed that while […]

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WASHINGTON—Running into several White House staff members as they tried to sneak their new friend inside, the Trump boys reportedly begged their father Tuesday to let them keep a homeless man they had found as a pet. “Please, Daddy, please can we keep our fuzzy buddy?” said Eric Trump, his visibly hopeful eyes widening as […]

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OpenAI announced new safety features will be soon coming to ChatGPT in an effort to better protect teens and others experiencing “acute distress.” The Onion shares a selection of those safeguards. Begins every conversation by telling users not to vape Targeted BetterHelp ads for any user in the midst of a mental health crisis  Parental […]

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Florida’s surgeon general announced that the state will eliminate all childhood vaccine mandates, although legislative approval may still be required. What do you think?

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