Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Trump Claims He Can’t Be Expected To Remember Every Birthday Card He Sends To Child Molesters

WASHINGTON—Stressing that it was unrealistic to think he would recollect one such letter out of the vast number he has written in his lifetime, President Donald Trump told reporters Tuesday that he shouldn’t be expected to remember every single birthday card he has sent to child molesters. “Every month I’m probably sending off a dozen […]

The post Trump Claims He Can’t Be Expected To Remember Every Birthday Card He Sends To Child Molesters appeared first on The Onion.

4-Year-Old Accepted Into Mensa

A 4-year-old from Illinois who scored 156 out of 160 on an IQ test was accepted into Mensa, the largest and oldest high-IQ organization in the world. What do you think?

The post 4-Year-Old Accepted Into Mensa appeared first on The Onion.

Poll Finds Most Desirable Quality In   Romantic Partner Is Being Jacked Centaur

WEST LONG BRANCH, NJ—With the attribute far outpacing characteristics such as humor, kindness, or wealth, a poll released Monday by Monmouth University found that the most desirable quality in a romantic partner was being a jacked centaur. “Among our sample of over 40,000 respondents, by far the most coveted trait in a potential significant other was […]

The post Poll Finds Most Desirable Quality In   Romantic Partner Is Being Jacked Centaur appeared first on The Onion.

Megan Haloiti and Patrick Leigh

The bride said “I do” despite the groom mentioning the film Interstellar three separate times in his vows.

The post Megan Haloiti and Patrick Leigh appeared first on The Onion.

Lab Rat

The post Lab Rat appeared first on The Onion.