Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Crenellated Aesthetic

For those who know what “crenellated” means, like we do, this house has it (or them). Crenels here, crenels there. Just a ton of that good stuff. Reference #49308

The post Crenellated Aesthetic appeared first on The Onion.

Trump Denies Writing 36-Volume Comic Titled ‘Don And Jeff: Time Pedophiles’

WASHINGTON—Dismissing the swashbuckling sci-fi romp as “a total hoax” amid growing scrutiny over his relationship with Jeffrey Epstein, President Donald Trump made remarks Tuesday denying that he had written a 36-volume comic titled Don And Jeff: Time Pedophiles. Obtained last month by the House committee investigating the late financier and child sex trafficker, the Time […]

The post Trump Denies Writing 36-Volume Comic Titled ‘Don And Jeff: Time Pedophiles’ appeared first on The Onion.

Betty Greenberg and Stephen Harold

So many musicians were hired for this pair’s lavish wedding band that a new instrument had to be invented called the harmoniaphone.

The post Betty Greenberg and Stephen Harold appeared first on The Onion.

Dad Calling    Just To Say He Loves King Crimson

BROCKTON, MA—Acknowledging that he doesn’t get the chance to say it that often, but emphasizing that it doesn’t make it any less true, the father of local resident Eric Flores reportedly called him Thursday night just to say he loves King Crimson. “Hey, champ, I wanted to drop you a line to tell you that I […]

The post Dad Calling    Just To Say He Loves King Crimson appeared first on The Onion.

Sarah Carney

Sarah Carney, 64, died peacefully last weekend. In lieu of flowers, the family asks if you would mind picking up one of her legs and lifting her body together on the count of three.

The post Sarah Carney appeared first on The Onion.