TrumpRx has officially launched. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the new government website.  Q: What is TrumpRx? A: A strange line item you’ll see pop up on your credit card bill 15 times in a row. Q: What kinds of prescriptions can I get through TrumpRx? A: TrumpRx offers low-cost access […]

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The U.S. economy experienced almost zero job growth in 2025, with the Bureau of Labor Statistics data indicating that the U.S. economy added only 181,000 jobs compared to 1.46 million in 2024. What do you think?

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WASHINGTON—Hailing the move as a more wholesome and patriotic substitute for the current U.S. territory, conservative advocacy group Turning Point USA announced Thursday that it was setting up an alternative Puerto Rico. “Finally, Americans will be able to enjoy a family-friendly tropical paradise that actually celebrates traditional values,” said Turning Point CEO Erika Kirk, adding that the island would be known as “Port Rick,” a mistranslation of “Puerto Rico” that […]

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SAN FRANCISCO—Heralding what it called a “bold new age” in warping the mind of the nation’s elderly leader, OpenAI introduced a new premium video generator Thursday marketed toward White House advisors manipulating President Donald Trump. “Our new Stephen video generator is an easy, user-friendly text-to-video model that can create clips up to two minutes long […]

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