Reading List

The most recent articles from a list of feeds I subscribe to.

Big Lots Closes All Stores After Therapist Helps Company Work Through Hoarding Tendencies

COLUMBUS, OH—Finally closing the doors on its last remaining outlet after getting rid of an unwieldy stockpile of variety goods, the discount retailer Big Lots ceased operations Wednesday following a therapy program in which the company’s roughly 30,000 employees confronted their self-destructive hoarding tendencies. “In retrospect, it’s almost funny that I had so many throw […]

The post Big Lots Closes All Stores After Therapist Helps Company Work Through Hoarding Tendencies appeared first on The Onion.

Trump Examined By Doctor After Acknowledging Existence Of Suffering

WASHINGTON—Following reports that the president was “troubled” and “disturbed” by images coming out of Gaza, White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt told reporters that Donald Trump was examined by a doctor after he acknowledged the existence of suffering earlier this week. “It’s possible that his statement recognizing starving children in Gaza was just a case […]

The post Trump Examined By Doctor After Acknowledging Existence Of Suffering appeared first on The Onion.

Study Finds Refreshingly Low Amount Of Shovel Violence

BALTIMORE—Describing the data as good news in an otherwise troubling area of research, a study released Wednesday by the Johns Hopkins School of Public Health found a refreshingly low amount of shovel violence across the country. “Despite high levels of shovel ownership in the United States, what we are seeing is an encouragingly low number […]

The post Study Finds Refreshingly Low Amount Of Shovel Violence appeared first on The Onion.

‘Quishing’ QR Code Scams Dupe Millions

QR‑code phishing or “quishing” scams are on the rise, with malicious codes intended to trick users into divulging personal data or downloading malware. What do you think?

The post ‘Quishing’ QR Code Scams Dupe Millions appeared first on The Onion.

Mavericks GM Trades Away All Of Team’s Basketballs

DALLAS—In a move already being described as one of the most surprising transactions in NBA history, Dallas Mavericks general manager Nico Harrison confirmed Tuesday that he had traded all of the team’s basketballs to the Brooklyn Nets in exchange for cash considerations. “Sometimes you have to make hard decisions to position your franchise for success, […]

The post Mavericks GM Trades Away All Of Team’s Basketballs appeared first on The Onion.